French psychologist Albert Thibaudet developed the concept of crystallization in the 1930s. In psychology, particularly in the context of interpersonal relationships, crystallization describes the process by which a person often idealizes another in the early stages of a romantic relationship.
The person who crystallizes often projects onto the other idealized and exaggerated qualities in this process. These ideal qualities can be based on physical traits, personality characteristics, talents, or accomplishments. The person being crystallized is often the subject of intense and sometimes irrational adoration.
During crystallization, a person may overlook or downplay the less positive aspects or flaws of the other person. In the early stages of a relationship, when people are getting to know each other and exploring mutual connections, this process can be particularly intense.
However, over time and with a better understanding of the other person, crystallization tends to fade. The reality of the relationship becomes more evident, and the person idolizing may realize that the other is not as perfect as they initially thought.
In other words, in relationship psychology, crystallization refers to the process during which another person is intensely idealized at the beginning of a relationship, before this vision gradually fades and individuals have a more realistic perception of their partner.
10 criteria to identify crystallization
Excessive idealization :
You have a tendency to idealize your partner, considering them almost perfect or even flawless in your mind.
Projection of idealized qualities :
You often idealize your partner by attributing exaggerated and embellished qualities or characteristics to them.
Minimization of flaws :
You have a habit of underestimating or ignoring your partner’s flaws or less positive aspects, considering them insignificant or nonexistent.
Intense admiration :
You feel deeply admiring and often irrational towards your partner, perceiving them as unique or exceptional.
Disconnection from reality :
You tend not to notice your partner’s flaws or negative behaviors, which could distance you from the reality of the relationship.
Feelings of euphoria :
Do you often think about your partner or experience euphoria, intense happiness, or exhilaration in their presence?
Conflict avoidance :
You prefer to maintain a positive image of your partner in your mind by avoiding conflicts or disagreements.
Focus on positive aspects :
You set aside any potential problems or difficulties and primarily focus on the positive aspects of your relationship and partner.
Rapid and intense commitment :
Perhaps you invest quickly and intensely in the relationship without sufficiently evaluating compatibility and expectations realistically.
Resistance to criticism :
You struggle to accept criticism or constructive feedback about your partner, staunchly defending their idealized image.
It’s crucial to remember that crystallization can vary in intensity from person to person and isn’t necessarily a hindrance as long as it doesn’t significantly disrupt the relationship or personal well-being.
However, it’s helpful to recognize and understand this process to maintain realistic expectations and a balanced perspective in a relationship.
10 negative consequences of crystallization
Disappointment and disillusionment
If the idealized expectations do not align with the reality of the relationship, it can lead to feelings of disappointment and disillusionment.
Difficult breakup
Realizing that the partner is not as perfect as initially perceived can complicate and make the breakup of the relationship more difficult and painful.
Difficulty resolving conflicts
Crystallization can make resolving conflicts in a relationship challenging as the person may struggle to recognize their partner’s faults or mistakes.
Relationship dissatisfaction
If idealized expectations do not match the reality of the relationship, it can cause dissatisfaction and discomfort within it.
Development of an idealized view of love
Crystallization can contribute to forming an idealized view of love, making it difficult for the person to maintain realistic expectations in future relationships.
Emotional dependence
Emotional dependence can result from strong idealization of the partner, making the person unable to function without their approval or presence.
Social isolation
Idealizing one’s partner can lead the person to withdraw socially or neglect other important relationships due to excessive focus on them.
Decreased self-esteem
When the reality of the relationship becomes evident and the idealization fades, it can cause a decrease in self-esteem, especially if one realizes they have idolized their partner.
Cycle of unstable relationships
Crystallization can foster a cycle of unstable relationships where the person quickly idealizes a new partner without truly learning from past mistakes.
Difficulty maintaining a long-term relationship
Crystallization can make it challenging to maintain a long-term relationship due to unrealistic expectations and difficulty accepting each other’s imperfections.
Conclusion on Crystallization
In conclusion, crystallization in romantic relationships is a fascinating and complex phenomenon with profound implications on our perception of our partners and our relational life.
While initial idealization can lead to feelings of happiness and euphoria, it can also result in disillusionment and difficulties if not balanced by a realistic understanding of the other person.
It is essential to recognize and understand crystallization to cultivate healthy and lasting relationships. This means being aware of the idealized expectations we place on our partners, as well as the less perfect but equally important aspects of the reality of our relationships.
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